Theater of My Mind

As I sat down for lunch recently, something seemed to activate the theater of my mind.  I forgot about my afternoon to-do list.  Instead, scenes from a shocking interaction with a bully replayed over and over.  I recounted the cruel, nonsensical words spewed at me months ago.  Where did this “play” come from?  After all, I had not purchased any tickets!

My thoughts seemed to run wild.  I conjured up other similar scenes from the past.  Suddenly, I am propelled back to grammar school and wearing glasses for the first time!  I’m teased, ridiculed, and embarrassed.  I feel rejected, just as we all have at one time or another.  While my untouched salad waits for me, my stomach feels as if it has just been kicked in.  My heart sinks, as I picture “little me” in yesteryear.

Bully Lane

Yikes! If I continue down this path of thinking, the rest of my afternoon will be miserable and unproductive.  Fortunately, I recognize the rabbit hole and yank myself out of it.  I shake off my trip down bully lane, leave the “theater”, and ground myself back to the present moment.

What good could come from replaying someone’s harsh words over and over again in my mind?  Who was the bully to pass judgement on me anyway?  How would reminiscing about other bullies serve me in the present moment?  Allowing a bully to live rent-free in my mind would allow him to repeatedly offend me forever and ever – all while he moves on with his life.  It would be like choosing to watch a bad movie over and over again.  No, thanks.  Next theater, please!

Negative Consciousness

The mind does not need to be trained to think negatively.  It’s human nature.   We are surrounded by negative consciousness in this world of ours.  It takes effort and maturity to think positively, but you’ll find you have more energy as a result.  

Keys to Being Mentally Strong

Mentally strong people tend to bounce back quickly in the face of adversity.  They have the confidence to pursue their goals in spite of circumstances.  The ups and downs of life tend to affect mentally strong people less.   

The good news is that everyone can learn to develop their mental fitness muscles.  Mental strength requires discipline, commitment, and self-awareness just as physical exercise does.  Some tips to strengthen your mental muscles include: 

• Prioritize sleep – Most people require seven to nine hours of shut-eye each night.   Without proper rest, you are setting yourself up for a host of problems.  Insufficient sleep can impact mood, response time, ability to concentrate, and even hunger levels. 
• Learn to distinguish opinions from facts – There are all sorts of reasons why people sometimes feel the need to express their opinions to you and about you.  Although it can be very hurtful at times, it is important to learn to distinguish their often unsound opinions from genuine facts.  “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” (~Eleanor Roosevelt)
• Learn from constructive criticism – Although criticism can sting, it can also be an impetus for personal growth.  If you train yourself to view it as feedback rather than a personal attack, you may be able to learn from it.  Of course, some people will be more than happy to mercilessly condemn you, leaving you questioning your own right to exist.  Stay away from these blowhards!  Rather than work on themselves, they’ve made it their mission in life to tear others down to their miserable level.  They won’t offer you anything constructive. 
• Catch negative thoughts – Like weeds in a garden, unchecked negative thoughts can grow out of control.  Learn to identify negative thoughts and replace them with more life-affirming, faith-filled, postive thoughts.  “Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t, you’re right.” (~Henry Ford)
• Practice gratitude – Develop a daily habit of reflecting on the things you are grateful for.   We all have things to appreciate in life.  The fact that we are breathing is something to be grateful for!  Practicing gratitude will make focusing on what you do have in life instead of what is missing a habit, thereby increasing your sense of personal satisfaction. 
• Choose your friends carefully – Be aware that the people closest to you influence your decisions, attitudes, and moods.   If you are surrounded by negative people who bring a lot of drama into your life, it is bound to affect you.   Limit or eliminate time with negative people.   Surround yourself with supportive people who exhibit the characteristics you would like to have. 
• Get physical exercise – Physical activity has been shown to increase feel-good chemicals in your brain.   It helps to reduce stress and change your emotional state.  In addition, those who exercise tend to sleep better and be in better physical shape.   A completed workout contributes to a sense of personal accomplishment and enhances confidence. 
• Learn to control your emotions – Feelings provide useful information as we navigate our way through life and relationships.  However, feelings change constantly.   It is important to be able to move toward your goals despite any negative emotions you may be experiencing.   Learn to identify the thoughts that contribute to your emotions.  Feelings are not facts and should not be relied upon as such. 
• Monitor your self-talk – Disparaging remarks from others can damage one’s self-esteem.  Sometimes, we accept what others have said about us as truth and repeat the message internally.  Learn to challenge such limiting beliefs.   Talk to yourself as kindly as you would to a cherished friend.  Use uplifting, life-affirming statements. 
• Discover what works for you & do it! – Take the time to discover the things that uplift you, so you can utilize them in times of stress or challenge.  Allow yourself the time to employ your go-to stress relievers, such as journaling, a walk in nature, reading, or knitting.

Mental Fitness

What’s playing in your theater of the mind?  Just like athletes have coaches for physical fitness, Coaching helps clients improve mental fitness.  If you’d like to explore how Coaching can assist you, please schedule an introductory call here.

Let’s create the right formula for you